Neither here nor there

Hi Honey,

Usually I get the idea about what I want to say before I think about a title.  In the last few days the words keeping popping up “neither here nor there”.   It is how I feel about life right now.   In the past you and I have read, talked and speculated about Heaven.  We’ve heard several stories by people who supposedly have been there and back again.

Even though many have gone before me it is not the same as knowing you are there.  I’ve always thought of Heaven as a real place and know that God is real.   It is now so much more real to me since you are there.   I spend quite a bit of time trying to picture what your days are like now.

It is sort of like having a pen pal in a country you’ve never visited.  It seems so far away but it really isn’t.  While I am doing everything I usually do down here I suppose you are busy as well.  How wonderful it must be not to have a single concern or problem.  All my guesses about what it is like there are just that, guesses.  No one can know for sure.  What I do know is that being in God’s presence has to be good.

My days here are pretty routine.  Eating, sleeping and working are the norm.  Sometimes I wake up early and sometimes late.  I stay up late and watch the news or a movie or play on my computer.  Shannon is still here with me.  I imagine she will stay no more than a couple more years.   Of course there is the constant letting the dog in and out.  

I thought I would have a lot more to write about.  I find though that much of the past is starting to fade.  I’m not sure why.  I can barely remember yesterday let alone ten or twenty years ago.    Perhaps that is why neither here nor there is the title of this post.  I feel lost between two worlds.  I look forward to being there where you are.  In a sense I have already left this place.  It holds no value.  Of course our kids and grand kids are here and all our other family.  It all seems so temporary now.   When you left it made me realize just how really temporary this life is.  What is fifty years in the history of this world and compared to the future of the next?  It isn’t even so much as a blink of the eye.  Things that seemed so important to me at one time are so insignificant now.  

If I have another forty or so years left on this earth what is that?.  Not much.  In that time many things could happen but nothing seems so terribly important.   I still believe much of how we spend the future is dictated by the plans and decisions we make today.  I’m not certain though how busy we need to make ourselves.

It’s one thing if we are taking joy in what we do.  But if we just like to create work and it leads to stressful situations than what is the point?  I am trying to avoid stress as much as possible.   The ultimate goal is to be happy is it not?  I am thinking more about this all the time.  How to be really happy in the time I have left.

Well this was a little about not much.  My final conclusion is that life does not need to be complicated.  It should be simple, easy and enjoyable.   We were not put on the earth to be stressed and worried.   We don’t need to make simple things complicated.  We should strive to make the complicated, simple.  As least that’s my opinion right now.  I cannot worry yet about tomorrow.

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